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Ghost Jokes

Don’t get spooked by our ghost jokes. These are Halloween jokes for kids and adults too. Everyone will enjoy scaring up a good time telling ghost jokes around Halloween.

For extra fun, parents can add ghost jokes or other Halloween jokes to lunch boxes as a Halloween countdown this October.

Spooky blue ghosts in moonlight

Q: What is the first thing you do after finding out your house is haunted?
A: Call the movers!

Q: What is it called when a group of ghosts rob a bank?
A: A polterheist.

Q: Why did the ghost eat a vegan raw food diet?
A: Because it’s super natural. 

Q: Where is a ghosts favorite vacation spot?
A: Maliboo.

Q: What do ghosts do to stay in shape?
A: Exorcisms.

Q: How do ghosts greet each other?
A: They say “How do you boo?”

Q: What are the only horses ghosts travel on?
A: Night-mares.

Q: What do ghosts order at Starbucks?
A: Black coffee with scream and sugar.

Q: What are the only cars ghost travel in?
A: BOOicks.

Q: What do ghosts put on top of ice cream sundaes?
A: Whipped screams.

Q: What do ghosts make to celebrate Halloween?
A: Ghoulash stew.

Q: What do ghosts eat for dessert on Halloween?
A: They love Boo Berry Pie.

Q: Why did the ghost look so stiff?
A: His sheet was starched.

Q: What should you do if you see a two-headed ghost?
A: Say hi and hello.

Q: What kind of pants do ghosts wear?
A: They wear Boo Jeans.

Red Ghost

Q: How do you know a ghost is getting angry?
A: It will start turning Red.

Q: What room do ghosts love to haunt?
A: The Living Room.

Q: Who can write great books but won’t get any credit?
A: Ghostwriters.

Q: What do ghosts give humans for dessert?
A: I Scream.

Q: What is a ghosts favorite meal?
A: Spooketi.

Q: What storybook do ghost parents read to kids at night?
A: Sleeping BOOty.

Q: What bird do all ghosts like?
A: Scare Crows.

Q: What do ghosts do on Halloween?
A: Anything they want.

Happy Halloween Ghosts in Orange Moon

More Ghost Jokes

Q: What fruit do ghosts prefer?
A: Boo berries.

Q: Why did the police officer ticket the ghost on Halloween?
A: It didn’t have a haunting license.

Q: Where do high end ghosts get their sheets?
A: At BOOtiques.

Q: Why are ghosts great at cheerleading?
A: They have a lot of spirit!

Q: What do you do when there are five ghosts at your door?
A: You hope that it’s Halloween.

Q: Why did the ghost have low self esteem?
A: Nobody believed in him.

Ghost reading stories about people

Q: Why do ghosts like to dance?
A: They love to BOOgie. 

Q: Where do ghosts go to send out packages?
A: The ghost office.

Q: What beaches do ghosts like to hang out at?
A: Beaches along the Dead Sea.

Q: What does a Panda Ghost eat?
A: Bam-BOO!

Looking for a book of ghost jokes to read at home? Check out Uncle Amon’s Ghost Jokes: Halloween Jokes for Kid.

Q: How do ghosts keep warm in colder weather?
A: They wear flannel sheets.

Q: Why do ghost get caught whenever they tell lies?
A: Everyone can see right through them.

Q: Where do children ghosts go while parents are haunting houses?
A: To the Dayscare Center.

Q: What do mom ghosts do when their child floats into a tree.
A: Kiss the kid’s boo-boo.

Q: How do you know a ghost is a teenage girl?
A: She will be wearing Mask-Scare-Ya make-up.

Q: What medicine do ghosts take when they get sick?
A: They take Coffin Drops.

Q: What did the Haunted home owner tell the ghost in the attic?
A: Ghostay at another house!

Q: What game do ghosts like to play on Halloween?
A: They play Hide and Shriek.

Q:Why don’t ghosts ever have messed up hair?
A: They use scare-spray.

Q: Where do ghosts go to water ski for the weekend?
A: Lake Eerie.

Q: What does a ghost mom say before starting the car?
A: Fasten your sheet-belts.

Q: What do you call a ghost chicken?
A: A peck-a-boo.

Q: Who represents all ghosts in Congress?
A: The Spooker of the House.

Blue ghost

Q: How can you tell a ghost it sad?
A: It will be blue.

Q: How come ghosts know the future?
A: They read their horror-scope.

Q: Why do young ghosts have wrinkles?
A: They don’t like getting ironed.

Q: Why do ghosts like group sports?
A: They like to see the team spirit.

Q: What do ghosts in Australia do for fun?
A: Play with a BOOmerang.

Q: What is a ghosts favorite birthday cake?
A: A sheet cake.

Q: Why did the ghost stop in the middle of his speech?
A: There were a lot of Boos from his friends.

Q: Who does a ghost love more than anyone else in the world?
A: His mummy.

Q: Who will greet you at a haunted house party?
A: Your party Ghost.

Q: Why did the ghost starch its sheet before going out?
A: It wanted everybody scared stiff.

Q: Why didn’t the ghost do as well as the witch in school?
A: He was bad at spelling.

If you enjoyed these spooky ghost jokes, be sure to check out our other Funny Halloween Jokes. We have pumpkin jokes, skeleton jokes, Halloween jokes for kids and Halloween jokes for adults. All of our joke pages are family friendly and fun for kids except for the adult Halloween jokes page.